My opinions on life, the universe and everything

Issue for the week :

♠ 5/23/07 Socks

⊗ Tube socks
Colorful socks
Toe socks
Sports socks
The world of socks.
Oh, I almost forgot, knee high socks.
I like socks. They’re great. I hate wearing shoes without socks, unless they are sandals or flip flops. I don’t like sleeping without socks. It makes my feet feel weird.
I know it’s such a weird subject to talk about. Pillows are great too. I love making pillows.
I feel more motivated now that I have that out of my system.

♠ 5/18/07 Second Life

⊗ If you don’t know what Second Life is, go to www.secondlife.com.
In any case, I’ve been a member for maybe two months now. I’ve been traveling around and exploring the world. I found an island in which you can sit down for 75 seconds and get something free.
So I got a Bat Mobile. Awesome to the super max. Doesn’t get much cooler than that. Besides the Bat Mobile, I got a DHL Delivery Truck, a red car, a yacht, and various other mobile devices.
Quite interesting. The yacht attaches to my head. Very odd indeed.
Second Life is definitely fun, you should try it.

 

♠ 5/7/07 How Macs Should Learn to Fly

⊗ It’s been quite a stressful unit for the Freestyle student population. Our documentary websites, all based in CSS (Cascading Style Sheet) have miserably failed us on several occasions, audio documentaries choose to turn from pleasant voices to garbled demon speak and all the while, we calmly study each problem and attempt to fight it.
Which is where the flying lesson for Macs comes in. Free of charge. For Macs of all ages. Location for this class would be Freestyle Academy of Communication Arts and Technology, on weekdays, between the times of 1 and 4 pm. Minor injuries to bystanders may occur, helmets recommended. Broken screens, circuits, fans, etc. will be sure to cover the ground. Clean-up crews provided.
Bags for Mac components will not be supplied, if you wish to take home your broken Mac please bring your own bag.
In any case, the frustration that I have felt in this past week has reached its low point at last. I’m starting to relax. However, I still think that Macs should fly.

 

♠ 4/20/07 Oh no, National Stoner Day

⊗ So today is National Stoner Day. Everyone makes such a big deal about it. Like stoners don’t get stoned every other day of the week. Some people I know showed up to school stoned.
What is the purpose of that? Do you want everyone to know that you need to pump your body full of chemicals? I would be ashamed to show up to school impaired. People do not need to see you like that, it’s not the cool thing to do, it doesn’t impress me. Not at all.
I just don’t understand the fact that everyone makes this big deal bout it.

In any case, I’m going to a show tonight. I’ve been named the official photographer for Sins In Our Shadows, my friends band. I’ll go, take pictures, and go home. I’m not in the mood for a show today. I’m a bit tired.

 

♠ 4/6/07 Mongoose

⊗ What is the plural of Mongoose?
Mongooses? Mongeese?
I think it should be Mongeese.
“I have one Mongoose.” “Hey! I have three Mongeese!”
They are cute, furry mongoosey animals.
They go “moosey mooosey moosey”.
Seriously, what is the plural?
Someone help me!
I am descending into a Mongoosey disaster!

 

♠ 3/29/07 Flow of Words

⊗ “It's these substandard motels on the (lalalalala) corner of 4th and Fremont Street.
Appealing only because they are just that un-appealing
Any practiced catholic would cross themselves upon entering.
The rooms have a hint of asbestos and maybe just a dash of formaldehyde,
And the habit of decomposing right before your very (lalalala) eyes.

Along with the people inside
What a wonderful caricature of intimacy
Inside, what a wonderful caricature of intimacy”
            -Panic! At The Disco, “Build God, Then We’ll Talk”

Certain combinations of words and the way they flow off my tongue catch my attention. Perhaps it’s the reason I started listening to Panic! At The Disco. They seem mainstream and like many other bands, but something about the way the lyrics are written really grabs my attention. Emotions seem to be conveyed well to me with each song I listen to.
The lyrics that I posted above are just an example of what I am talking about. There can be so many interpretations of what they mean, which makes them great, they are unique for every person. Utterly unique.

 

 

♠ 3/16/07 Body Modification

⊗ Having my eyebrow, lip and ears pierced and seeking to get more piercings and acquiring tattoos, I admit that I am definitely biased toward body modification. However, I do try to keep an open mind. I can understand that some people call it self-mutilation, and in a way it is. I am deliberately having someone put thick needles through my skin. I will have someone pierce my skin with a needle and insert ink underneath it. What may be my reasons? Why do I do it?
Some people just don’t understand it. To them I’m a freak, someone with no manners. I cannot count the times that I have gotten blank stares that turned to disgust. Is my self-expression really all that bad?
I am well spoken, respectful, have manners, try my hardest in school, strive to be someone in life. The only thing that sets me apart is that I have metal in my face.
So I read up on body modification. And I was astounded, almost appalled to find a study that says people who get body modifications are people that would commit suicide if they did not get body mods. Who came up with that crap? I’m sorry to say that the people I have encountered are happy individuals, they don’t seek to destroy their lives, they seek to live them fully and express themselves, using their bodies as a journal.
So why do you stare at me like I’m a freak? Maybe you’re the one that’s the freak.

 

♠ 3/8/07 Fast Food Nation

⊗ I am currently reading a book called Fast Food Nation by Eric Schlosser. So far it has given information on founders of big fast food chains like McDonalds, Burger King, etc.
It’s a really interesting book. For example the founder of KFC is a high school dropout, cared for mules, delivered babies as an obstetrician without a medical degree, practiced law without a law degree and was a traveling salesman, selling his secret recipe for fried chicken. Of course he did many other things but it’s amazing to me that someone like that just boom, ends up selling fast food.
I’m appalled by some of the things that the author presents in the book. Soda companies and fast food companies are trying to advertise in schools! SCHOOLS! The place where we are supposed to get an un-biased education. Some school districts already have accepted contracts with Burger King, Subway and other fast food chains. They are now being advertised in hallways, on school buses and even on the school’s roofs.
I’m quite disgusted with the tactics of fast food chains and soda companies, even trying to sell their product to babies. It’s all about the profit, not the health. How repulsive.

 

 

♠ 26/2/07 Train

⊗ I don’t know about anyone else but when I’m in a moving vehicle I seem to have the best thoughts, well, perhaps not the best, but insightful ones. This past week I went to visit my parents. They live three hours from my location and I took Amtrak.
The first leg of my journey was by bus. Once I hit Stockton I took the train to Merced, at which point my Grandmother picked Joe and I up.
While on the train, watching the landscape roll by I let my mind wander. I put on some music and let go.
The bay area scenery soon melted into fields of green inhabited by cows or sheep. The occasional house, often dilapidated, would rise from the dirt surrounding it. California was starting to turn green. The rain seeping into the fields and reviving the gold to green.
The way home was a rainy one. Once again sitting on the train I let my mind flow. Camera in hand this time, I was ready to watch.
Once again green fields filled my eyes. The rain clung to the window, giving me a droplet view of the world outside. Clouds filled the sky with a dreamy gray fog.
Most people would prefer to sit in a warm house, with a cup of hot chocolate, underneath a blanket, watching TV or reading a good book.
I think I’ll ride the train.

 

♠ 15/2/07 Reality vs. Fantasy

⊗ We are stuck in a reality. Or so we think. What if we are living a life that is in fact not a reality? It’s a fantasy that someone is having, someone, alone, is fantasizing about our lives. We’re a Fantasy.
So maybe that’s a bit extreme, but how do we know what we experience is real? Is it the fact that we can touch it? Feel it? Taste it? Hear it? Etc.
What makes it real? What makes it Fantasy?
Is a Fantasy always designed to be pleasant, an escape from the everyday?
And then who is the escapee? You, me, my parents? Or just someone thousands of miles from here.
Perhaps we will find out one day if we are the Reality or the Fantasy. I doubt it, but one can have hope.
Personally I think we are stuck in a semi-Reality, semi-Fantasy. We know we feel, we know we touch and experience, but we question and doubt as well. We question our decisions, we doubt our feelings.
I know how I exist. I exist in my Fantasy world within my music and I exist in Reality within your realms.
Find your Fantasy, touch your Fantasy, experience it. It might just be what your Reality has been searching for.

 

♠ 4/2/07 Being sick  
         
⊗ I was sick all week and didn’t go to school, hence the lack of a blog.
Contracting an illness from your friends is icky. A lot of my friends got the stomach flu and somehow I ended up with it. So for a whole week I stayed at home, did nothing. I did try to attend school on Thursday but just couldn’t make it the whole day.
I am behind in my school work now because of it, and during that week huge drama broke out with my friends, which of course did not make my flu any better.
Next time I’ll just build a bubble and stay away from sick people.

 

 ♠ 2/2/07 Local Music

⊗  The local music scene needs to be kept alive. I find that most teens consider music their life and come across people listening to their music wherever I go. However many people have no clue about local music. Who’s So and So? Mainstream music is just fine, I listen to plenty of mainstream. I just don’t like it when people won’t explore. Do you always want to live in your little cocoon? I know it’s safe, but break free. There is such good music hidden away in the little towns you waste away in.
Local musicians tend to be the nicest people you will meet. They aren’t doing the music stint for money nor fame. They do it for the music. True, many local bands never make it big, they might eventually break up. But hey, you shared an experience with them, you heard their music, heard their voice. You heard them share their emotions in a raw fashion, you can’t get that through mainstream. And if you’re lucky, they have some low-quality demo CD you can buy that’ll keep the voice with you forever.

My friends are in a local band. They have a show tonight and I am psyched to go. I haven’t been to a local show in a while and I’m really looking forward to this one. It’s gonna be great. Music, friends, freedom. Freedom in a town of restrictions.

Enjoy your lives, weird kiddos, while you can.

 

♠ 1/26/07 Dreamweaver and Flash

⊗Ugh!
They can rot in hell. Yea, let’s put them on the web, noo, not for youuu!
I don’t even know how often I synchronized my new pages and they would not show up.
Who designed these programs? Some idiot….Frustrating.
And Flash…don’t even get me started. Might be able to make more capable to communicate with other programs. Nope, not for me. It’s like the program looks me straight in the face and tells me SCREW YOU!
Ghweiohgwhgiourh
Angry.
At least it’s done with.

 

♠ 12/18/06 Cultural Ignorance:

⊗ The year is 2006, almost 2007. We are surrounded by technology of the higher degree. Our culture has spread itself out, expanded, consumed.
And yet I watch TV and find people that are culturally ignorant, just last night I was watching a show with a family of 17, living as if we were stuck somewhere between the 70’s and 80’s. Mullets, horrid clothes, no idea of technology. And the one excitement being to have another child.
Haven’t you heard about the population growing almost psychotically, running out of natural resources?
And the worst part, these children will grow up, leave their home to start their own life and it’s going to be one nasty surprise that the world is not as rainbows and butterflies as their home life was.
They will be confronted with today’s culture. It’s bad enough that you have 14 siblings to put up with, but not to know how the outside world functions, is dreadful.
I can understand that these people have beliefs, traditions, and their own culture, but their children should be able to learn culture for themselves. Learn that mullets went out of style about 20 years ago, ha-ha, I jest. More seriously, these children will have a hard time finding a job, learning new technology. It’s a thought I just can’t comprehend.
I respect their choice of life, it’s their life, let them lead it, but I just don’t understand why you would choose to stay so culturally ignorant.

 

♠ 12/14/06 Random rambles:

⊗ Dreams with Smells
Glow woman
Together we dream
Wishing the night
Were different
Pretend and whisper
Drinking in sweet thought
Read the perfume your mother was
Where nectar pretends to love
Smells climb but travel nowhere
Waters delight is your gentle whisper
With love you drown
Fly sweetly towards death
My friend, always dream at night
[written by me: 12/2/06]

I wrote this poem on the spur of the moment. I think it resembles somewhat of a disappointment. It is the hypocrisy that we as people have to face everyday. Our culture, our home lives, our politics, they are all based on hypocrisy. Does Bush really believe that we are fighting terrorists in Iraq? Do your parents really believe that you not having sex will keep you from becoming a sexual deviant or pervert? Anything is possible. But we are told it is not. Drink in the hypocrisy.

 

♠ 12/6/06 Imitation:

⊗ “Imitation is suicide.”
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

I believe that everyone imitates in one form or another. There is no such thing as being completely different.
You hang out with people and you begin to copy their phrases, the way they act. It’s completely subconscious. Oftentimes the person doing this doesn’t even realize that they are committing this act of imitation.
Style in itself is one big imitation. Think about all the companies that now produce shoes that look like Converse All Star. Off brands in America, Germany, all over the world. So how can one say that we are free of replication? When we see something that we like on another person we try to find it, get it.
Our whole way of life is centered around imitation. The foods we eat, the way we dress, the way we act. It’s all one big imitiation.
Now we can try to be ourselves, be free of some influence from others, but in the end our brains are designed to imitate, to copy. We were designed to learn from others and the past.
Ralph Waldo Emerson may say that imitation is suicide, and in a way it is, but it can’t be evaded. So we kill ourselves slowly. I try to be myself, I’m not you, I’m not them, I’m me. And in the end no one can take that away from me

 

♠ 12-/1/06 Ignorance.

⊗ “Ignorance is bliss”
NO! IT IS NOT!
I am amazed at how many ignorant people I encounter everyday or people who simply won’t admit when they are wrong.
For example: politics.
One of my friends loves President Bush because he is Christian. That is the only reason, she knows nothing else about him, none of his political views. How ignorant can one be?
My Aunt supports Bush simply because he’s Anti-Abortion.

It drives me up the wall. I do not like Bush because of his Politics! Not his personal views.

Now there’s that kind of ignorance and then there is the other kind.
Being ignorant to someone’s needs.

I know a family that doesn’t love each other. They despise each other to the point where they live in the same house and don’t talk nor look at each other. I admit that I can’t understand it, coming from a loving family and all. How can you separate so far from those that should be so close to you? How can you be completely oblivious to their needs?

Ignorance may be bliss to some, but not me. I can admit when I am wrong, when I don’t know something. Why can’t you?

 

♠ 11/21/06

⊗ THE MEGAN-KAH RANT :
So Megan put me up to composing a list of how awesome she is. LET ME START!!

1. She is ASIAN!!! [mm sushi]
2. She has half a soul, ooooh yea!
3. She helps me all the time with these darn technological failures I have.
4. She hearts my German-ness.
5. Omgosh, she cuts her own hair.
6. Gotta love the way she drives.
7. She torments the people we hang out with.
8. She is mucho intelligent.
9. She's got that little black bunny that is adorable.
10. She makes scarves, only the real cool kids do that.
11. What, no more braces? Darn right!
12. She showed you how you make bunny cry. [awwww]
13. THE LUCKY NUMBER, THE BEST FOR LAST.....[drumrollllllllllll]....You cannot deny her the love that she steals from you....THIEF!

Anywho, Megan-kah, you're awesome and I'm glad that we have class together because I'm sure I would have died or killed the computer if you hadn't helped me fix all those "technical difficulties". I hope that we'll be friends for quite some time.You're very taented and I enjoy you're friendship.
This rant was for those of you who don't know a good thing when you have it. Never take your friends for granted, they might be there for you more than you think.  

 

♠ 11/17/06

⊗ Brutal Honesty:
It depends on the situation. If you meet someone who is extremely overweight, but you know they are trying to lose weight you wouldn't go up to them and say: "HEY LARDO!". I wouldn't. HOWEVER, if a woman is trying on a dress and she comes out and asks you if she looks good in the dress and you think that it just doesn't suit her, would you tell her it looks great? Naw, I'd tell her that maybe she should keep looking, that it just doesn't fit her corretly. She asked for it. She has to deal with it. She has no reason to get mad.

 

♠ 11/7/06 Narcissism

⊗ Excessive love or admiration of oneself. See Synonyms at conceit. 2. A psychological condition characterized by self-preoccupation, lack of empathy, and unconscious deficits in self-esteem. 3. Erotic pleasure derived from contemplation or admiration of one's own body or self, especially as a fixation on or a regression to an infantile stage of development. 4. The attribute of the human psyche charactized by admiration of oneself but within normal limits.

Definitions thanks to www.dictionary.com

⊗ The word narcissism comes from Greek mythology, Narcissus rejected Echo's advances and was thus doomed to fall in love with his own reflection and wither away. Freud believes that it is a part of all humans once they are born. Some people even say that in adults a healthy [low] level of narcissism is essential to keep the balance of needs balanced to the needs of others.
Excessive narcissism is recognized as a personality dysfunction referred to as NPD [Narcissistic Personality Disorder].

Information thanks to Wikipedia

⊗ I agree that some narcissism keeps us in balance, but when it gets to the stage where you are obsessed with yourself and lose touch with other humans you need to get some help. Nothing is worth losing touch with others. The moral of the story is: never reject a nymph and don't try to date yourself.

 

♠11/1/06 Politics

⊗ Bush:
He has made mistakes in the past, he bankrupted his fathers business, he was [still is? not sure] an alcoholic, I do believe he dropped out of college. Why is this man our president? I, personally, do not like the job he is doing. He falsified things to start a war that is still raging and shaking our economy, he is trying to pass a law banning gays from getting married. I cannot in any sense agree with his morals. I dislike him. However, he is human. We will move on, get a better president.

⊗ Government:
It's a wonderful idea in theory. Have some people up there trying to keep order in society, however humans are corrupt and power hungry and all that governmental power gets to their heads and we, the public end up in shitty situations due to it. Does America realize that most of the world sees us as a bunch of bumbling fools, a bunch of bloody idiots. Our governments represent us. We should try our hardest to get good officials into it. Anarchism is a good theory, would never work, for all reasons stated above. Humans are corrupt. So let's stick with what we have, we're all alive and have decent lives. =]

⊗ War:
I am sick of discussing this issue. War is war, humans get mad, take it out on each other. War can be anything from a fight between a mother and daughter to full-scale blowouts between to nations. It happens. We fight over land [our side of the room], natural resources [who gets the last of the milk], etc. I don't agree with it, but it happens.

 

♠10/31/06 Self-abusive Behavior

⊗ Eating Disorders:
It is complicated. It reaches into the whole mental aspect which can't truly be pinned down and explained. Certain girls think they are fat and want to lose weight, others find themselves too skinny and want to gain weight. Either way, it only becomes a problem when the ways of losing/gaining weight are unhealthy and damaging to your body. If a person goes and works out, or sees a doctor to consult them about a diet change, that's fine. However, you eat junk food to gain weight or you jam your finger down your throat to lose it, it's not good for your body, your body will suffer, and you will not feel any better. Side effects of anorexia can be growing a sort of fuzz on your skin, how is that going to make you feel more attractive? Now I'm not blaming the victims of this mental problem. I just hope they can be recognized and someone will help them. Everyone is beautiful, regardless of their physical appearance.

⊗ Self-mutilation:
Society looks down upon this 'problem'. Marriages between different races used to be an absolute taboo, now it's accepted. Hurting yourself has become a nacceptable behavior that has tp ne stopped immediatley. If cutting/burning/bruising yourself/etc. gives you peace and calm, keeps you from breaking down, then do it. Calm yourself. Some people smoke, some eat, some choose to self-mutilate, what's the difference? Smoking and over-eating seems a tad more dangerous than self-mutilation. People see scars, burns, anything of the sorts and immediately assume suicide comes next. No, it does not. It's a calming method. I hope one day it will be acknowledged by society as a valid way to calm yourself.

 

 

♠Emo Haters...[gag]

I have never understood how people could generalize "Emos" as being whiney little kids with no experience of life who cut their wrists to make themselves feel better. They apparently beg for attention and thrive on it, further cutting themselves to get the all wanted attention.

It is absolutely shameful that anyone would believe this. Most people do not even know what "Emo" really stands for, what it really is, how it came to be, what some Emo bands are. Ignorance breeds hate, ridicule and heaps of misunderstanding.

The true definition of Emo is an Emotionally Charged Punk- Rock band. The fact that most people are ignorant about Emo is because most of its most influential records were released as vinyls in small numbers.

"The "Emo" genre started out as emocore in 1984/85 in DC and then spread quickly to the Bay Area and then all over the US. Phase two: EMO. Some Emo bands: Moss Icon, the Hated, Silver Bearings, Native Nod, Merel, Hoover, Current, Indian Summer, Evergreen, Navio Forge, Still Life, Shotmaker, Policy of Three, Clikatat Ikatowi, Maximillian Colby, Sleepytime Trio, Noneleftstanding, Embassy, Ordination of Aaron, Floodgate, Four Hundred Years, Frail, Lincoln, Julia, Shroomunion, some early Unwound, etc.

-The vocal style is usually much more intense than emocore, ranging from normal singing in the quiet parts to a kind of pleading howl to gut-wrenching screams to actual sobbing and crying. Straight-edge boys tend to hate that part, and much derision is levelled at emo bands on this point. Most emo bands tend to have some epic-length songs that build up very slowly to a climax where someone cries. If you're receptive to this kind of thing, it can be extremely powerful and moving, since it's very hard to fake that kind of pure emotion convincingly.
-Lyrics tend toward somewhat abstract poetry, and are usually low in the mix and hard to decipher. Record inserts have lyrics, but often so disorganized and haphazard that they're very difficult to read [unless the record was released on Ebullition Records, in which case there are many inserts on small, brightly-colored papers containing poetic writing from the label owner and all his friends about disillusionment, anger, and things that happened when the writer was four. Such writing is known as emo writing, and there are many, many zines just like that]. Said inserts are almost always done with antique typewriters or miniscule hand-lettering, containing no punctuation or capitalization. Often the only information about the band listed is the band members' first names. Another trait of really emo records is to have no information whatsoever about song titles.
-a modern perspective: the term "screamo" is used a lot nowadays to describe bands that are based most heavily on this kind of music"

Definitions thanks to http://www.fourfa.com/styles/index.htm.

Based on all of thisd information how can one gather that Emos are kids who cut themselves for attention, maybe said people should educate themselves about the issue before drawing any conclusions about a genre. I don't think that every person that listens to deathmetal is a satanist, so why would anyone say that I cut my wrists and cry because I like Emo music?

Sometimes common sense fails humanity....[le sigh]

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